Wraps & Waffles…

Currently Listening To: “Furthest Thing” by Drake…

 

Well, lets see… I have completed two full It Works Body Wraps and 2 re-used wraps… so a total of 4 wraps but really 2 wraps, wraps. Yea. So here are my results from the 1st wrap’s results & the 2nd. I don’t see a difference.

 

Image

 

I have been working out… once a week. Damn. My weight loss journey is just slowly coming to a slow demise. I gotta get this shit together. Maybe things would be a lot better if I didn’t have to worry about eating/cooking shit like waffles, fried chicken, marinara chicken, garlic bread, etc know how to cook… But I know how so its a problem. I only eat unhealthy when I don’t feel like eating healthy. Lol. That doesn’t make any sense at all. All I know is this… I love food. I TRY to eat healthy. But when I’m low on food and in survival mode, I think of A LOT of bad shit to eat… like…

 

 

Image

Seasoned Tortilla Chips & Marinara Chicken Dip…

 

-OR-

 

Image

Panko Fried Chicken & French Vanilla & Red Velvet Waffles (The condiments are ranch dressing, maple syrup & honey mustard)

 

Image

However… I did eat healthy at least one day. Cajun & Lemon Seasoned Salmon with Roasted Broccoli & Herb Brown Rice.

 

I’ll get it together eventually… My 3rd wrap is today. Yay.

 

My First Wrap Experience

Currently Listening To: “Induction Speech” by Young Money…

 

Alright. So last Friday evening I got my first wrap done by a local rep. She was very polite and answered my long list of questions I had typed up hours before. Questions like how do I wrap my breasts, how do I preserve wraps that are cut, do wraps get rid of skin tags, have people used wraps on their wrists or necks. I wanted to know this stuff.

So anyway, here are my thoughts on the overall experience. I think its very difficult to drink tons of water throughout the day. I hate water with a passion so it wasn’t an easy task. So to make it a bit easier, I decided to make my own detox water.

Image

Strawberries, oranges, pineapples and mint. It was definitely a refreshing drink however… it wasn’t refreshing enough to make my ass want to keep drinking it.

 

As for the wrap? Well… you tell me. Me personally, I don’t think it was all of that. I didn’t see drastic results like other folks did. The only main thing I noticed is that my belly button wasn’t looking so sad anymore. To be honest, I didn’t see any results. My belly button looks sad because someone else took the picture. I just went back and viewed some past photos of myself in my phone. My belly button never looked this sad. Its because the rep was short so I guess she took it at a weird angle. Whatever.

 

Brace yourself! These results are gruesome!

Image

 

I read a post on here where someone re-used their wrap. I know that it clearly states that its not reusable but shit… my wrap still had some herbal lotion on it. I wasn’t about to NOT use it. So i cut it up, placed it on my obliques, bottom area of my tummy and my double chin. I left the chin wrap on for 45 minutes and the rest of the areas I left on… about 10 hours. I know, I know… It says 8 hours. But what harm can a re-used wrap really do? If it doesn’t work, oh well. Not like I was supposed to use it anyway. I could’ve had the opportunity to take it off on time considering my boyfriend walked in the house at 4 a.m. this morning and scared the shit out of me. I was sleeping on my living room couch (yes – i prefer my couch over my bed) and I hear my door open. I wasn’t expecting him to come over until later this evening. Regardless… I couldn’t take the wrap off. I didn’t want to smell like herbal Vicks around him. So I kept it on and took it off 2 hours later when I got up to get ready for work this morning.

I took my measurements the day after the wrap then once again last night. I actually gained a fucken inch. I know what you’re thinking… well what did you eat?! I think I ate pretty damn good if you ask me… compared to my usual at least.

Image

Smoked Salmon Bagel…

 

Image

Turkey Breast sandwich with veggie chips 

 

Ok. I know. Shut up. I fucked up with the breads. *Deep sigh* And the cupcake I had on Sunday. And the black & milds I had yesterday before my complete 72 hours were done. You don’t know my life!!

Rome wasn’t built in one day!

I’ll do better.

What’s the best things to eat on wrap days?

Weight Loss Results… Week Whatever

Currently Listening To: “Loyal” by Chris Brown featuring Lil Wayne & French Montana…

 

 

This post will be very short. I am a little upset that I am not seeing the results that I would like to by now. So here are the results of my journey so far from the past 3 weeks…

 

Image

I’m so mad with my results I don’t even know if I am tracking the weeks right. I started March 3rd. What week does that make it? I don’t know. I don’t care, I don’t care.

 

Tomorrow evening I am trying the It Works Body Wrap. I will be sure to keep track of my results this weekend and post them on here Monday or Tuesday. Ciao!!

That Crazy Wrap Thing

Currently Listening To: “Partition” by Beyonce…

 

So I have recently decided that I am going to get “wrapped”. That’s right, I am going to finally try out It Works! Body Wraps this Friday. At first, I’m not even going to lie, I was a little skeptical. I was approached by a woman a few months ago while I was at a bus stop. And she was telling me about how she does wraps and it makes you lose weight. First thing I thought to myself was, well if that’s the case, then why isn’t your stomach flat? Lol. Rude but true. I mean seriously. How can you approach someone about purchasing your product when you aren’t even an example of it. So I politely declined. This was some time last year. Plus I had my own body wrap that I was trying out that my friend told me about. Cellulite Cream, Vitamin E Oil and saran wrap. Yea. That shit didn’t work.

 

So fast forward months later, I’m bigger. And the heaviest I have ever been in my whole life. Honestly, I feel like all the hard work and effort that I’m putting in the gym and eating right isn’t getting me the results that I want to see. I mean damn, its been over a month. And it seems as though I see no change in my body. Its frustrating and annoying as hell. So I am taking the next step to intensify my new lifestyle change. I am going to get wrapped this Friday evening by a rep named Cynthia. I am also becoming a Loyal Customer as well. Time for a change.

 

I have some new inspiration this week… Here are some ladies with some BAD ass video vixen bodies. Just give me the ass and waist and I will be satisfied… geesh.

 

Keyshia Ka’oir

Measurements: 36C-26-42 (She recently lost a shit load of weight so I’m sure her measurements have changed)

Image

 

 

Dominique Chinn

Measurements: 36D-25-41

Image

 

Yaris Sanchez

Measurements: 34D-26-44

Image

 

Miracle Watts

Measurements: 32B-29-44

Image

 

So tell me… Have you ever tried that Crazy Wrap Thing?

Booty Lifter Review…

Currently Listening To: “Bubble Butt” by Major Lazer featuring Bruno Mars, 2 Chainz, Tyga & Mystic…

 

 

So I finally received my booty lifter in the mail on Tuesday from http://www.kaoticvon.com. Here is my opinion. First of all, its too damn small and too damn tight. Don’t say you’re sending me a damn 3X when the shit is really a Large. Like really. It took me FOREVER to get into the damn shorts. They were so damn tight around my thighs that it started cutting off my blood circulation. The material ripped in the thong area which is absolutely ridiculous considering I just bought this item. Smh… Never wasting my money or time with this company ever again.

 

So this is the package it came in… They sent me two different sizes. Of course I tried the 2X/3X…Image

 

This is what the booty lifter looks like out of the box…

Image

 

So this is the image that they display on their website… It gives you the illusion that your butt is going to be lifted and rounded.

Image

 

WRONG!!! Here’s are my results…

Image

Ok so there is definitely a difference, but not a dramatic one like I was hoping for, like how their photo falsely indicated. My shit is supposed to be lifted, not an extra “crease” at the bottom of the booty cheeks, sheeeeiiit… I already had that anyway. The girl in that photo probably already had a bubble butt. This shit wont work for someone such as myself, that has nothing to start off with from the get go. Smh…

Image

Here’s another photo I took with it on. You can clearly see the indentations from how tight the material is. Especially around my upper/mid thigh where its cutting off my damn circulation. I would never be able to wear this underneath something outside in public, the areas that are supposed to be invisible are so visible.

I tried it on for my boyfriend Tuesday night. He wasn’t all that impressed either with it. Even though he says he is fine with just the way I am, he is still somewhat supportive of my weight loss journey. He said that if anything, it looked like it was going to make my thighs smaller to give the appearance of a bigger ass. Which is true and goes the same for having a smaller waist, it will “automagically” make it seem like your other body parts are a little bit larger and stick out a little further. So we will see… I tried to workout with it on and almost ripped my asshole so that wont be happening again. So back to the leg press, squats & lunges I go… Yay!!  -_____-

So tell me folks… Am I just trippin; or do you see something that I don’t? Let me know…

 

Next gadget to order: Waist Cincher.

Image

 

 

 

Private Chef Skills vs. Willpower – Which One Do I Get Rid Of?!

Currently Listening To: “Make Me Proud” by Drake Featuring Nicki Minaj…

 

 

will·pow·er

noun \ˈwil-ˌpa(-ə)r\

: the ability to control yourself : strong determination that allows you to do something difficult (such as to lose weight or quit smoking)

 

 

This past weekend started a little bit early. I was able to get off of work on Friday around 10:30 AM. I went straight home, cleaned up my entire apartment (I just don’t understand how it gets so junky sometimes when most of the times, I’m the only one there). Hit up my weed man… Then after that, I honestly don’t remember what happened. I cant remember what I did. I don’t know if I worked out or what. I honestly cant remember anything… lol. That’s bad – I know.

Saturday morning came… I woke up early then I worked out! Yep… I am SOOO happy that I have my mojo back because for a minute there I was getting worried. I want this Video Vixen body so damn bad but its hard to accomplish a goal when you have no motivation whatsoever. Glad that stage has finally passed. I didn’t work out for too long because there were too many people in the damn gym. Like we only have 4 pieces of equipment in our apartment complex gym and the shit I was waiting on was being occupied. So I quit early and decided that I would just get the rest of my exercise by going to the store to get a money order for rent & also picking up a few supplies since it was my boyfriends birthday. In case ya didn’t know, I am a HUGE hopeless romantic. But we’ll get into that shit another day. Anyway, I waited and waited on the city bus… and waited. That muh fucka never came. So I went back into the house and took that as a sign to smoke again. A few puffs and chokes later, it was time to go back out and wait for the damn bus. Oh great! It’s raining! Smh… Long story short, I got everything I needed. But I didn’t come from out of the Save-A-Lot store quick enough. Just as I was walking out, I happened to look up and see my bus riding past the bus stop that I was supposed to be standing at. Smh… I’m not even going to lie, I sat there for a few moments, wondering if I should cry or tough that shit up and just walk all the way home since the next bus wasn’t coming for another 45 damn minutes. I TRIED to walk… getting soaked and all. Until the lightning stopped me. Hurried and ran into a sandwich shop and waited in there until the coast was clear. I saw a few folks come in ordering shit, made me think about their lives. Like did they have a good life? Were they happy? Did they live paycheck to paycheck? I wondered… were their lives anything like mine. I doubt it. Anyway, I ran out of the sandwich shop in time enough to catch the next bus. Yay…

Sunday morning came… and I worked out again!! For almost 2 hours! Jogging, speed walking, jump rope, elliptical, leg press, high incline, squats and some arm pully thing-a-ma-jig. I felt so good. All the times I thought about giving up, I went even harder. Especially when a certain song came on… I’ll tell you about that song later. So anyway… I’d say this weekend was a pretty productive weekend even though I didn’t get a chance to see my boyfriend 😦 Hopefully today though because I got some shit planned out the ass when he gets there. Rose petals and lit tea light candles will lead the way to the bathroom where a romantic bubble bath will be awaiting him, the water will be a beautiful ocean blue with scented bubbles filled to the rim for him to enjoy. Soft sexy and slow music will enter the atmosphere as he relaxes. There will also be a birthday candlelit mini Cherry pie waiting for him as well that he can enjoy while he soaks in the warm bubbly water (He loves him some pie). While he is enjoying his bath, I will put the finishing touches on his birthday meal – a homemade gourmet pizza with chicken chunks, seared broccoli, pepperoni, smoked gouda & asiago cheese, tomato sauce, oregano and a slight drizzle of truffle oil (all made from scratch by yours truly of course). Sweet tea with a hint of vanilla & infused with fresh orange slices. For dessert? Me. Duhhh… Nah. But he will have a small pot of dark chocolate fondue waiting on him with the following items to dip: oreos, rice krispie treats, nutter butter cookies, apple & orange slices. While he is eating that, I will set up something romantic in my bedroom… A romantic spa oasis where I will give him the best massage of his life (as usual) with warm lavender scented baby oil & some fellatio oral gel. I also have this nice liquid heart massager by Pure Romance that can turn extremely hot within just a few seconds, he loves that. The rest of the evening will be up to our imaginations… I will be sure to take pictures of what I can. If he doesn’t come over tonight? Well… lets just say today might be my cheat day.   -_______-

 

Anyways… I wanted to do something different today. I wanted to share with you all how I gained my weight. I am a gourmet private chef. I cook for couples ONLY. I create a romantic dining experience for my clients. They enjoy my delicious home-cooked meals at their homes, parks… and even the beach! (which is my most popular dinner experience to date). So when I cook for them, of course I have to test, create and try out new dishes for them to enjoy. My problem is I don’t know how to just taste. I gotta devour that shit. Ughhh… the struggle is real. So here are a few items that I have been enjoying a few days/weeks/months before my new lifestyle journey began, the shit that got me to the weight I am today…

 

Image

“Reese’s Stuffed Chocolate Dipped Oreos with a Pistachio Crumble…” (one of my faves)

 

 

 

Image

“Lovelle’s Comfort Cookies (White & Milk Chocolate Chip Cookies)…” (top fave)

 

Image

“Buttermilk Pancakes with a Rum Berry Compote…”

 

Image

“3 Spice Fried Chicken Strips & French Vanilla Waffles…” (I love me some chicken & waffles)

 

Image

“Grilled Salsa Verde Taco Pizza…”

 

Image

“Surf N’ Turf Burger (Grilled Cheddar Bacon Angus Beef topped with Smoked Gouda & Muenster Cheese, Grilled Onions, Grilled Shrimp & Chipotle Aioli)…”

 

Image

“Bruschetta…” (I love this stuff!)

 

Image

“Lobster Stuffed Mushrooms with Broccoli Sprouts & Chipotle Aioli…”

 

Image

“Bruschetta Chicken Pasta…”

 

Image

“Oven Baked Beef Hot Dogs with Avocado, Pico de Gallo & Wasabi Mayo and Deep Fried Garlic Tator Tots with fresh parsley…”

 

Image

“Baked Shrimp Scampi & Shrimp Scampi Pasta…”

 

 

Image

“Chili Cheese Hot Dogs & Garlic Tator Tots…”

 

Image

“Twice Baked Chili Potatoes…”

 

Image

“Honey Hot Wings & Potato Wedges…”

 

Ok, ok. So maybe MOST of these foods are things that I enjoyed cooking and tasting for myself, let alone a client. I have issues. I know this. And now that I know, I know how to improve and do better. I can honestly say that… Ok. Let me just stop myself while I’m ahead before I tell a lie. I have had ONE of these items while I have been dieting… Which isn’t TOO bad (you don’t know my life). Can you guess which one?

 

I’ll give you a hint: It starts with pan, ends with cakes. They were scrumptious too!

What’s your favorite cheat food?

I got my mojo back!!

Currently Listening To: “Mirror” Justin Timberlake…

 

Where do I begin… Alright. So I have this smoking problem. I love to smoke. Mids, Dro, Purp, Grand Daddy Purp, Kush, whatever. I love that shit. I would spend my money on weed before I spend it on food. Ok, I’m totally lying. But you get the point. I love to smoke. I love the way it makes me feel, I love how creative I am when I smoke it. It makes me fuck better, sing better, cook better. It has been a blessing to my life since I started smoking back in September 2013. Anyway… The reason I brought that up is because Im not sure if it is interfering with my new lifestyle or not. I smoke before I go work out. The way I see it is like this, weed burns calories. It speeds up your metabolism, hence the reason you are so fucken hungry afterwards. But that’s the problem. It makes me EXTREMELY hungry when Im done. So I go in the fridge, come up with some bomb ass shit, but its not healthy. Ughhhh… Im going to get it eventually. Next time I go grocery shopping, I’ll be sure to buy only healthy shit so if it does come to that point again (which it will in approximately like 4 hours) at least I will have something healthy to snack on. Like apples, oranges, grapefruits. Wait… I already have all of that shit in my crib. But i go STRAIGHT for the ice cream and shit. No bueno.

 

Anyway. Yesterday was a toughie. For breakfast I had straight up junk food. Im talking about vending machine snacks at work when I had perfect good oatmeal waiting on me. I be tripping. But yea. So i had 2 Cinnamon Crumb Cakes, Pepsi and some Hershey’s chocolate. Followed by some chips… Then my 1/2 of chicken wrap. When I got home, I felt like fucken crap. I felt nauseated and everything. Weed nor a black & mild was going to be able to help ease the icky feeling. Then my favorite cousin hit me up. I told her how I was feeling so exhausted lately and that’s probably the reason why I havent been in the mood to exercise or do anything productive. I had no intentions on working out yesterday. I was too busy feeling sorry for my fat ass. Then she texted me: “Get your ass to that gym.” I smiled then got my ass up and went to the gym. Of course it wasnt as simple as that. It was still a struggle. I had to shake off that queasiness and find my damn workout clothes which is a task in itself because after not working out for a whole damn week? Yea. I had no idea where my shit was. Luckily I did find it though… umpteenth minutes later. First I put on my workout pants, then my shoes and socks. The reason I do that is because I work out with shit around my waist so its difficult to put my shoes and shit on after I got all that other shit on. So yea. Next was albolene with saran wrap wrapped around my waist, followed by 3 waist slimming belts. Yes 3. I have a big ass waist and stomach so…. Yea. The little short ass belts I bought from Ross a few weeks ago werent long enough to fit this big ass torso, so I had to improvise. Shirt. Ponytail. Gangsta Music. Lets hit the gym.

I stayed in there for 45 minutes. I did 15 minutes on the treadmill at first. Jogging at 4.0 for 1 minute then speed walking for 2, then repeating until the 15 minutes were completed. Then I dragged my ass to the leg press machine and did 10 minutes on that. The reason I do leg presses is not for my legs, its for my butt. If you press on it with just your heels (toes hanging off or pointing up) it targets your glutes. And as you will notice in the picture below, I NEEDS to target my damn glutes because i have no-ass-at-all. But from the back? That shit is wide, plump & has a crease. But side view? Nah son… Nah…

 

So I decided since I did so terrible with this week’s weekly photo along with not dieting & exercising properly for almost 2 weeks, geesh, I wanted to switch it up a bit. Instead of that other boring ass outfit I randomly picked out, I decided to choose something a little more revealing to show my flaws, which there is alot of. So here we go…

Image

I put week 3 results because technically, this body is the result from week 3 – a hot ass mess. lol. I fucked up so bad because of my boyfriend and my lack of willpower. Not anymore! I got my mojo back and I’m ready to give these bitches a run for their money! As you can see, it looks like I gained weight… alot. I expected to hit a bump along this lifestyle, but damn… I honestly didnt know it would happen so quickly. And if you’re wondering why I chose this outfit over the last, its because I feel like this is the type of shit I will be wearing once I drop the weight. Hoochie-fied. That’s right. What da prollum?

This morning I woke up 25 minutes earlier than usual (thanks to my cousin) and I worked out my core for 10 minutes then forced myself to drink a glass of cold water with honey & grapefruit in it. Lets just say… Im regretting that damn water. Shit got me feeling nauseous as fuck right now. Tried to smoke a Black & Mild to calm the feeling, and it only made it worse. So all i want to do right now honestly is get something in my stomach that’s going to soak up all of this damn nastiness. Ugh.

 

But yea…. no more excuses out of me. Just results. I’m trying to get that skinny girl top – thick girl bottom going on (I have big titties so I dont think Im going to get far with that skinny girl top shit – but ya never know!)

Anyway… Thanks for allowing me to rant. Its a weak ass pay day today. Time to hit up my weed man & re-up. #Deuces